I kept looking at her over the table. Hoping that she would look at me. Look into my eyes and understand what I am trying to convey. But she kept her head down going at the food. Lifting it up occasionaly to smile at me. Maybe just to not make me uncomfortable.
“How is the food?” I blurted.
“Hmm? Yeah..Ok” she replied.
“You know I had planned this so much in advance!”
“Is it? Ok”
Whoa! Where is the excitement? Am I expecting too much? How does she manage to respond in monosyllables to every statement of mine?
“Two Cappuccinos please”
She seemed more comfortable now. How did I come to know of that? She is smiling more! Anyway, I tried another shot.
“So..thanks for the time!”
“That’s ok. I should thank you too”
“For your time”
I closed my eyes for a few seconds. I imagined myself standing in an open field. It was vast and extended till my eyes could see. Then suddenly I heard thundering sounds all around me. I took a few steps forward to see hundreds of people running from all directions towards me.
What the hell man? Who are these people? Wait a second. They are me! 1000s and 1000s of me came running towards me at full pace. I had no escape route. They came close enough to scare the shit out of me. I put my arms to my face out of instinct. Then they stopped. I mean many of me stopped. They were staring at me. I withdrew my hands and stared back turning my head all around. Suddenly they started laughing at me. Laughing at the top of their voices pointing towards me. It was so insulting and scary that I shouted at the top of my voice…Noooo!!!
“I guess it’s time for you to go home now”
“Yeah. I should be back. I got something to attend to” she replied.
I drove the car at around 50MPH. Not any slower. Not any faster. Just in hope that she will have something to talk to me. But in vain. I wished for all the signals to turn red. And all the ones that are red to stay that way longer. I wished for the worst traffic jam ever on earth. I wished that I had a flat tyre.
I wished for all those things that would keep me longer in her company. But as usual, nothing happened.
I made excuses to take longer routes but all the routes seemed to come to an end in no time.
“What happened?” she asked surprised.
“Err..nothing…seems to be some problem with the engine. I just got it serviced recently. The idiots did not do a good job I guess”
Why? Why can’t you understand? I have been trying so hard. It hurts. It hurts real bad. My heart weeps.
I drove through her lane. I was scared that I had to drop her off now. Her gate seemed like an arch enemy to me. I braked in front of it.
“Ok. Thanks for your time. Will miss you!”
I watched her open the gate, wave a goodbye to me and dissapear. Hey wait a second. Did I miss something? I said I will miss her. She did not respond to that. Hmm.
Driving a little away from her house, I was thinking to myself. No I cannot give up so easily. I can’t lose hope. It is just a matter of time. I just have to be patient.
Smiling, I raised the volume of the music and raced home.